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Hi.
I just spent the past few hours crying and finally decided to take my thoughts somewhere else.
So I'll probably sound like I have a mediocre issue compared to some, but I just need to talk to someone who won't say "you're fine".
Where do I begin?
Today I finally confessed all I've been feeling to my mom after she yelled at me for forgetting to start dinner. I've been bottling it up and it all spilled out.
How much I hate the guy she's dating, which is her ex husband(which in turn becomes my stepdad) who used to emotionally and physically abuse me. (i.e.- threats, slapping, hitting, etc.) I talked about how much she's pressuring me in school, I have an 85% in my AP math class that apparently isn't acceptable. How I wanted to talk with her but I'm too scared to.
We ended that with her calling me selfish and confiscating my phone for two months. She says the phone causes all the problems. She refuses to believe that she might be causing the problem because she's just so perfect.
I'm tired of this cycle. I hate that I can't be with my dad full time. (My mom divorced him and later married the abusive step dad.)
I wish I didn't have to see her again.
I wish I didn't have to get only 3 or less hours of sleep because I always wake up to any noise in fear of my mom coming to yell at me.
I wish my friends did more than just say "cry it out" or "you'll be fine".
I'm open to help, please do.
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