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I’m sorry.
I’m so sorry.
Why did you have to mess your whole life up? Why did you have to start making your parents think that boys are all you think about in High School? Just why?? You wish you could go back to the past and change. Every single day. You try so hard to make them understand you, but they just think you’re crazy. They can hear you cry at night. Your sister could probably hear you cry at night. She can probably feel the tears on your pillow. But when you try telling her what’s been on your mind, all she says is “oh”. That’s it. Just “Oh”. You know, I remember you always told yourself you can’t do it anymore. That you had nobody beside you. And I want you to know that you do. You are so beautiful and yet, you just can’t accept the fact that you are. You don’t love anything about you. Except that you have a good heart.
Everyday you wish you could have waited until your Junior year of High School to get a boyfriend. You could’ve had the right boy to make you happy. Instead, you gave your heart to a boy who cheated on you with 2 of your best friends. And you gave all your affection towards him. You gave him a second chance… Only so he could hurt you again. You cried for months. 4 months you were in your room crying silently. You wished your parents would walk upstairs and hug you. Comfort you. Tell you that everything would be fine. The only thing that comforted you was your hoodie, your blanket, and your two dogs that ran upstairs to cuddle beside you.
You could have made better friends. You could have chosen the right people to hang out with. But instead, you’re stuck with people who probably don’t give two damns about you. You’re stuck with people who try to make you feel bad about yourself. You’re stuck with people who don’t stand up for you when you’re feeling upset. But there you are, standing up for them when they need help. They only need you for the stupid things. And when you need them, they’re busy doing stuff unimportant.
I wish I was there. Standing in your social studies classroom in eighth grade when you had a huge crush on a boy who didn’t feel the same way you did. Who messed with your head, making you believe he loved you. He even said the three words. “I love you. And I want to be with you.” Why did you believe it? I wish I could show you how bad you would end up hurting. Crying. Hiding. You hid your entire body for three years. You stopped eating for months. You stopped being happy. You cried for one year and five months. And nobody was there except your cousins. they was there for you when no one else was...
I'm sorry you're not okay. I'm sorry I'm not okay.
I'm sorry..
- I_Am_Hurting...
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