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Do you think its okay that I'm not ambitious? You see, I graduated this year with honor in uni and my parents have this expectation of me to have a better job along with salary. I don't really have a dream job, I'm okay with anything really.
Any job as long it something that i can do , is fine by me. I think they're quite anxious because in my family, its a thing you know- always showing off, your achievements etc.,
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It’s absolutely fine, there’s no wrong way to live as long as you’re not hurting anyone.
My family was super image-conscious, but me and my siblings have all just gone completely the other direction and…actually, it’s fine. Maybe they’re disappointed, but we’re not. It’s their problem, not ours.
None of us finished uni (I didn’t even finish ‘high school’/uk college). It doesn’t make us bad people. A job isn’t an identity, and personally I think that emotional intelligence/maturity is so much more genuinely valuable than formal education.
You’re fine. It’s your life, no one else’s.
ReplyIt’s fine to be yourself…people have expectations for others..and that in itself speaks volumes about their insecurities, disappointments and struggles.
You are not obliged, in this life to please anyone but yourself, competition for a higher spot in the pecking order can cause an individual to burn out and lack passion for the truly important things in life.
Just do you…
I’ve spent a lifetime pleasing the wrong people and being what they expected of me.
Just do you :)
ReplyI think it’s totally fine if your not ambitious—just focus on yourself
ReplyFirstly congrats… well I don’t think it’s a wrong thing, I mean if you’re willing to settle for anything and you feel good about it then it’s up to you not them… but just make sure what you settle for can cover all your bills 🗣
ReplyI think it's okay for you, but for them it's not. This is one of the problems nowadays for every honor student. They have lots of expectations without knowing that it might be sad for you. I think all you have to do is find something that will bring you happiness and make you grow as a person. Explain to them that life is not all about achievements; it's about passion, contentment, and dedication to be successful.
ReplyI'm a little older and one thing I've learned over the years is that people are different and they certainly like different things and have different goals. I say, often, that these kinds of things don't bother me and that I'm very open minded toward others but, to be honest, I do have one that I can't let go....but I know I should.
Over the years, I've worked to move myself up the corporate ladder. Each year I get a raise based on performance and every few years, I get a promotion that comes with more responsibility and an even higher salary.
My wife is the same age as me. We're middle aged. Unfortunately, she doesn't have this drive. She has always had an entry level position and an extremely low salary. We have a few children. One of them has been working for a few years and currently makes as much as my wife. We have another child who just started working this summer and her salary is HIGHER than my wife's. Oh, and that second child, she's still in high school. Our kids have friends who are just entering the work force now and they all have entry level jobs, like housekeeping, and many of them make more than my wife does. This, I must say, drives me crazy! I know I should let it go but I just can't.
We've been fortunate to live a good life, financially, for many years but I know that's mostly due to my drive and my salary as I make nearly four times what she gets. We're currently in a bind because we made two financial blunders (I invested heavily in a business that failed and she stopped working to take classes for the purpose of a career change and neither of these things panned out but both cost us dearly). Now, for the first time since I've known her, we're having to really think about "money stuff" and make changes to our lifestyle.
And it hurts to know that if she had any drive at all, she'd work to get a better position and a higher salary. That, alone, would help us tremendously and, depending on her new salary, could help us reverse this thing so we could solve our problems. Instead of thinking of ways she can bring in more money, though, she's pouring all of her energy into thinking about how we can sacrifice - let's sell this thing, let's get rid of this thing, maybe we can move into a smaller house, etc.
I don't mind us paying for our mistakes and I don't mind sacrificing if that's what it takes to fix this but getting rid of stuff and downgrading aren't the only ways we can fix this. She has no inclination to try making more money.
At any rate, now that I've practically hijacked your post with my own issues, I should loop back around and say that, even though I've spent so much time complaining, I do think it's ok that you aren't considering yourself ambitious but you should know a few things. First, you may be more ambitious than you are giving yourself credit for. Second, it's totally ok that you aren't sure what you want to do for a career, especially if you're young because you have plenty of time to figure that out. And third, you should know that while what you're doing isn't wrong, I do understand why it can be upsetting to some. My wife knows that I wish she would try raising her bar but I said what I had to say to her, I feel like I justified my reasoning, and now I just leave her alone about it. I think it's ok that others try to boost you up or nudge you to, as they would say, "do more" with your life but hopefully they're not bothering you with this often and that if you explain to them that you just don't yet know what you want to do, that they can just really, really accept that.
Whatever happens, we're wishing you good luck!
ReplyI don't think there's anything wrong with that, you can do anything you want with your life!
Reply