Defined by the desert

A country that I had never heard of, a complete upshift of my life but what did I care I was only 13. Looking back it was a relief, I was transported to a new life which came to define me as a better person - I am who I am because of the experience. I didn't think of loosing friends and being the new kid, it almost felt like an escape - a new beginning that I didn't really need but craved without realisation. As is the case when your older, you don't actually understand how good you had it as a kid.

As an adult, I feel a complete disconnect from my previous life, I find others that were in the same situation as me feel the same - we are all bound by a fractured existence in which all lives all became entangled for what sometimes felt like months, years and often decades. We are all now scattered, some of us still chat, some of us don't, some just got lost in the ether but yet we all look fondly back on our time.

Given the time again, you ask yourself - "would you do anything differently?" - no is the answer, I would do it all again but more intensely, I would throw myself at the effort - I would encapsulate my life around the experience, the friends, the constant stream of new faces and the farewell of old friends. Given the opportunity I would return - whilst nothing remains the same, the memories haunt my dreams and it would nice to see what has become of the country which I consider to be my home.

What stops a return, the humdrum of normal life - the job you hate, the mortgage that grinds you and ties you down, the kids who you love but just wouldn't get it at their age - the wife who would resent you for taking them away from their parents and family - everyone who tells you it isn't like it used to be - the lack of money for the plane ticket - all of the above? Who knows - but as the days and weeks and years pass, the memories become distant yet the urge to return is more present than I am in my everyday life.

I long to feel the heat on my face, the smell of the sea, see the Sheraton in the distance, feel my feet on the lush green grass that forever felt wet - to stand and look at what the country has become, to say hello and goodbye to landmarks long forgotten and to walk memory lane no matter however uncomfortable it may become.

Defined by the desert - 1/?