What are you looking for?
where is karma
1 year ago · · Narcissistic Abuse, · Explicit
i am a decent loving caring honest loyal person who while do anything the people i love and care about. But why is it i can never get it back ? I live by treat people how you want to be treated and you get what u give you reap what u sew . u have never done anything hurtful or hateful maybe one or two things to get revenge on someone that was way overdue for it But never have i acted out of line first im 46 yrs old never been married ive been a model a business owner bounty hunter office worker construction worker and most importantly a mother (not the greatest but.....) ive done the best i could in everything i do I just cant figure out why my life is so messed up no matter what i do no matter how hard i try everything bad grabs me and drags me down like right now ive benn in a four year relationship with the most evil 'unloving and uncaring person man i know he is a sociopath not sure if evryone knows what that is but believe me u dont wanna know or have one in ur life anything u do or say is never good enuff they have what i call "the new toy syndrome" youre the best thing in the world for about the first 3 or 4 months then they want nothing to do with you they dont wanna give you up but they are to busy with everything but you they dont talk to you they dont notice you if you speak ur a liar or wrong when they are nice to you its because they want something or they are about to do something horribly hateful to you or worst of all they just did something really really really messed and they think they got away with it they change per person specially if their friends are around then they treat u worse than a dog and love trying to make you look bad in front of everyone i live this every day i have no friends and im hundreds of miles away from home i live in georgia but im from indiana born and raised there i moved about 12 yrs ago and its a long story why but i will get into that at a later date anyhoo... this man im with likes to cheat and lie and tries to hide it not very well tho hes addictedn to sex amd online live camera sites i love sex but of course im not good enuff anymore to have sex with in his eyes my grandfather died and my furbaby that was my world died all in the same week i didnt get held i didnt get a hug nothing just a im sorry as i sobbed for hours night after night for about two weeks im left alone alot cause he has his buddies and family that i dont like to be around anyone with him cause he embarrasses me and treats me worse than ive ever been treated and thru all this i love him so much i stay loyal work and do anything i can for him i know i shud leave this is very toxic i cry atleast oonce or twice a day but i have no where to go and nobody to help me the area i live in has nothing like everyone here is poor and homeless there are no resources here for anyone he takes my money so i never have none where is karma why am i stuck in a life like this why cant i find someone to love me i dont think ive ever been truly loved in my whole life i wanna give up on life