To: Father, a message he will never receive.

Hey, I wish that you cared about me a little bit and didn't hurt me so much. I wished you were there as a child, not only now. I hope someday you will change, and learn to love your children. Learn not to hurt others. You don't need kids or a wife with an attitude like that, you need a maid. I fantasize that one day, you will regret your actions and apologize to me. I wish you'd give me freedom. Staying home doesn't benefit me at all rather than your yelling, demanding, and rudeness. That's all I get. I wish someone loved me, a friend, a colleague, a lover, or a sister, a brother, or my own mother and father. But no one was there for me. I was all alone. I needed love, not conditional, not a false one, not the threatening ones, just love. I don't know how to feel all the time. I am numb all day. I don't feel joy, or sadness, or anger, or fear. Just nothing. And I know it's because of you. You are not my father. If you stop hurting me or my siblings, then I'll consider you. Mother said that you think all your children are useless. When you're worse. You are nowhere near good, a narcissist. I don't want to live my life numb. No, I want to feel. I hope one day to find some peace in my heart if you would never apologize. I don't want to blame you, but it's too much. I'm traumatized. I hope you'll change. I only hope. Thanks.

(P.S. I know this is just a burden to you but hope you read this.)