End of teenage year...

idk whom to talk and what to talk. i am here because its too much now. i am a medical student and next year i have to give exam which will decide if i can get a college... f ! i know i am not gonna get one cuz i am well aware of my prepration.

the next thing is FRIENDS f them belive me everyone wants to befriend a person who have connection or if their daddy is rich or if they are aesthetic, i have been treated badly and looked down on. they treat me as if i am some outcast, no i am not dumb or fat but i have hair and a lot of hair on my arms legs face, i know whoever is reading this might be thinking '' why not shave?'' well its my toxic parent ughhhhhhh i feel so controled by them.

i like being alone but i love being in group, i love it when people adore me.

this generation like a person who is AESTHETIC and i want to be able to make friends but the villain of my story who is stopping me is my own parent here listen my mother is very conservative like a karen so if a girl is putting too much effort in her looks then she is a slut/whore , if she is doing skincare then again she is a slut , if she is shaving then again she is a slut , if she talks to a boy then again bruhhhhhhhh even my father is that way and they are doing it from the day i am born guess what this is one of the reason i have so less friends and i am too awkward to talk to a guy because again they altered my mentality in such way.

when i see social butterflies i feel so envious so inferior.

i also want to easily start a convo and be everyone friend but f!!!!!